So I've been housesitting/dogsitting this week for Will's parents. They needed someone to watch their dachshund, Humphrey, as well as just someone to get the mail, water the plants, take the garbage out, etc.

I have to admit that I've never gotten over my fear of being home alone all night. Especially in a big house. Now, yes, I do live alone in my apartment but that seems somewhat manageable since my apartment is small and I'm in such close proximity to others. But you put me all alone in a big house with lots of windows and weird noises, I get really freaked out. Last night I kept hearing strange sounds all over the house and then my mind races to what it could be (I always assume the worst). Needless to say, I locked my bedroom door just in case. I think I need to stop watching all those 48 Hours Mysteries about murders.

I think the scaredest I've ever been was in our old house in Wilmington when I was in high school. I used to stay up really late and watch TV in my bedroom and talk on AIM into the early hours of the morning. One particular night, when everybody else was asleep, I was up doing my usual routine when I heard a car door shut from outside. My window faced the street so I peered out my window to see who was there. All I could see was a silhouette of a man standing by his car parked right in front of our house. He just seemed to be standing there looking at our house. I just remember being real panicky that this man might try to break in and I contemplated waking my parents up, but to do so I'd have to walk across the hall in front of a big window that the man could probably see through. But just as fast as he appeared, the strange man left but I barely slept a wink that night.

I just hope that I won't hear anymore weird noises tonight :(

Losing a pet

Last week the sad reality of losing a pet hit hard as our beloved family dog, Miles, suddenly passed away. It's been tough this week to cope with his loss. Never had I imagined that losing a pet could be absolutely devastating - it's like losing a member of the family.

The circumstances of Miles' death have been a tough pill to swallow. We don't really know what happened but we speculate he either stopped breathing or had heart failure. He was still a "young" dog at 7 so we assumed we had at least a few more years to live, but I suppose his body couldn't hold on any longer. I just hope Miles didn't feel pain or struggle in his last few moments.

I've had pets (well, cats) my whole life, but none came close to the bond our family formed with Miles. I remember my mom and I really lobbying hard to convince my dad to let us have a dog. We knew we had to choose the perfect dog for our family, as well as the perfect dog for my mom's career. As a clinical social worker, my mom became aware of how animals can be used in patient rehabilitation and therapy. The positive effects of pet therapy have been studied and well documented and Mom thought it would be an excellent way to reach patients that wouldn't ordinarily be treated by standard means. After careful research, we found the perfect dog for our family and for her patients, a handsome French Bulldog puppy that we named Miles. Now, Miles had a tough beginning. He was the runt of the litter and was born with a herniated umbilicial cord that required three surgeries before we got him at three months. Although we might have been taking a risk by adopting a "sick" dog, we fell in love and even considered how patients might be able to relate to Miles' handicaps instead of a dog that was show-dog material.

I know everybody brags about how wonderful their dog is, but Miles really was wonderful. He never made a mess, he was so obidient, and he would always greet you at the door and was so excited to see us. He was most content just to sit in your lap or at your feet as if he was claiming you as his own. We nicknamed him "The Buddy" because he really was a buddy, a best friend, a pal.

Miles also made a difference in hundreds of people's lives. He was a regular at the hospital, working mostly with abused children. In fact, Miles was actually named New Hanover Regional Medical Center's "Employee of the Month." They did a news story on him about his accomplishments and how he was impacting so many people. More recently, I was able to witness Miles' positive effect when Hannah and I took him to a nursing home. One woman, who was bedridden, had just celebrated her birthday the week before and was so excited about having Miles visit her in her room. We put him on her bed and she was so content to pet him and talk about the dogs she had onced owned. When it was our time to go, the lady told me and Hannah that Miles' visit was her birthday present. That almost moved me to tears.

Miles' passing brings about a great void in our family. I went home this past weekend and it was so hard to walk in the door and Miles not be there to greet me. It was hard not seeing him in his room on his pillow like he always was. But life must go on and as the days pass on, the pain won't pierce any longer. I won't ever forget Miles. He was the best dog ever.